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~ Funny Humorous Quotes ~

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~ Funny Humorous Quotes - Is Laughter A Medicine? ~



When the sun comes up, I have morals again ~ Elayne Boosler

When we talk to God, we're praying. When God talks to us, we're schizophrenic ~ Jane Wagner

When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity ~ Albert Einstein
 
When you're in love it's the most glorious two and a half days of your life ~ Richard Lewis

Who says nothing is impossible. I've been doing nothing for years ~ Anonymous

Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves? ~  Robin Williams

Why don't you get out of that wet coat and into a dry martini? ~ Robert Benchley
 
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy ~ Benjamin Franklin
 
Without geography, you're nowhere ~ Anonymous

You can get much further with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone ~ Al Capone



~ Funny Humorous Quotes - Is Laughter A Medicine? ~



You can lead a man to Congress, but you can't make him think ~ Milton Berle

You can't be a Real Country unless you have a BEER and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a BEER ~ Frank Zappa
 
You can't have everything... where would you put it? ~ Steven Wright

You can't put a price tag on love, but you can on all its accessories ~ Melanie Clark

You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we don't know where the hell she is ~ Ellen Degeneres

You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named Bush, Dick, and Colon. Need I say more? ~ Chris Rock

You see much more of your children once they leave home ~ Lucille Ball

You're only as good as your last haircut ~ Fran Lebowitz



~ Funny Humorous Quotes - Is Laughter A Medicine? ~


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Definition of Funny / Humorous...Wikipedia

Definition of Funny / Humorous...The Free Dictionary

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