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~ Funny Humorous Quotes ~

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~ Funny Humorous Quotes - Is Laughter A Medicine? ~



All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height ~ Casey Stengel

All the statistics in the world can’t measure the warmth of a smile ~ Chris Hart

Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry ~ Bill Cosby

An expert is a man who tells you a simple thing in a confused way in such a fashion as to make you think the confusion is your own fault ~ William Castle

And on the eighth day God said, "Okay, Murphy, you're in charge!" ~ Anonymous

Any girl can be glamorous. All you have to do is stand still and look stupid ~ Hedy Lemarr

Any kid will run any errand for you, if you ask at bedtime ~ Red Skelton

Anybody can win, unless there happens to be a second entry ~ George Ade

Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot ~ Groucho Marx

Anything that is too stupid to be spoken is sung ~ Voltaire



~ Funny Humorous Quotes - Is Laughter Medicine? ~



As a child my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it ~ Buddy Hackett
 
As I may or may not say to the Lord on Judgment Day, "You ask a lot of questions for someone who has so much explaining to do" ~ Robert Brault

Be careful of reading health books, you might die of a misprint ~ Mark Twain

Be obscure clearly ~ E. B. White
 
Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes ~ Jack Handey

Before you put on a frown, make absolutely sure there are no smiles available ~ Jim Beggs

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes ~ Jim Carrey
 
Behind every successful man is a surprised woman ~ Marion Pearson
 
Best way to get rid of kitchen odors: Eat out ~ Phyllis Diller
 
Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt ~ Abraham Lincoln



~ Funny Humorous Quotes - Is Laughter Medicine? ~



Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before ~ Mae West

By trying we can easily endure adversity. Another man's, I mean ~ Mark Twain

Can we actually "know" the universe? My God, it's hard enough finding your way around in Chinatown ~ Woody Allen

Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely ~ P. J. O'Rourke
 
Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society ~ Mark Twain

Communism is like one big phone company ~ Lenny Bruce

Count your age by friends, count your life by smiles ~ Anonymous

Cross country skiing is great if you live in a small country ~ Steven Wright

Defy your own group. Rebel against yourself ~ Cathy Guisewite
 
Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive ~ Elbert Hubbard



~ Funny Humorous Quotes - Is Laughter Medicine? ~


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Definition of Funny / Humorous...Wikipedia

Definition of Funny / Humorous...The Free Dictionary

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